Thursday, March 17, 2016

When no one is happy, everyone is

Do do do doooooooooooo do do do do doooo BUM BUM

First off, I'd like to apologize to the three or so of you who may have read this once or twice. I've been slacking and haven't gotten anything out for a couple days and even missed Shitty Deck Sunday. I just have to remember that Magic always comes before my career and you all should understand since Magic is really all you have.

Now prepare your butts because this week you're getting a curve ball. Rather than talking about one bad card and one good card, you get TWO good cards for you wizards tower and you're going to be fucking pleased about it.

The easiest way make Wizards Tower weirder is to add universal effects that either help or hinder everyone. Some creatures have some nice effects for everyone but enchantments have the added bonus of not being able to be killed through combat tricks and there are some that are just short of Planechase cards. With enough universal enchantments mixed in your tower will be like a buffet where at first everyone is happy but then everyone either hates themselves or hates you. (Also I'm sorry I said buffet. I don't blame you if you make a trip to Golden Corral before continuing on.)



Now that you're all greasy on the outside let's talk about Magic a little more so you can feel greasy on the inside.

Note: Universal effects are only fun if you have friends to play with. If you don't I'd recommend reading the Magic Duels article since you have so many "friends" online.

I don't think the words "play" and "spell" are used enough on this card.

This card adds a weird bit of strategy to the game. With these card, even if you have infinite mana, at most you can play five spells a turn, six or so if you have a couple artifacts in hand. Multi colored spells only get things weirder. Sure you can cast instants on someone else's turn, but you need to make sure you do it before they do otherwise you're sitting there waiting another turn waiting to play your spell as you ignore the other spells being played. Kind of like how when people show you a youtube video you just kind of ignore it because let's be honest, the two or three videos you have in mind to show them in response are waaaaaaaaay better than what they're sharing.

Another thing to keep in mind with this on the field: counter spells. If they play a blue spell, you can't counter it. Instead you get to sit there like a helpless baby and watch as your opponents get to do whatever they want to you and your poor creatures. If someone counters something you love (like your tendies) you cannot use blue to prevent their counter spell. I recommend Dash Hopes. It's a silly card on it's own and it will almost let you counter someone's blue spell you don't want to deal with.

Gonna beat you to death with a swamp.

The other fun card you should add is Nature's Revolt. Turn all your creatures that you flipped face down into lands back into 2/2 creatures that are still in fact lands. With this being five cost you probably just gave everyone 4 or 5 creatures if you played it right away, and if it's late game who knows how many creatures everyone has (I ask because I probably can't count that high. It's a lot I'm sure.) There are so many things you can do with all your land creatures but if you really want to feel victorious and any real life friends you have, just board wipe. Now you can start over from square one. No lands, no creatures, no friends. Honestly, who needs friends though? We both know they're what's holding you back from becoming a pro anyways. 



No, you can't flip a morph creature that you played as a land if you play Nature's Revolt. Someone out there was thinking it.

Want to share your wizards tower? Want to try and convince me that you really are pro material it's just your friends that hold you back? Leave us a comment.

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