Thursday, November 24, 2016

Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving from Heavy Salami! This is going to be brief because I am going to go keep eating until I physically cannot move and have to be forklifted home. I hope everyone has a heavy Thanksgiving and that all you will have to be forklifted home as well.

I wanted to have a Thanksgiving themed deck built for today but I ran out of time. I would call it "Turkey and Stuffing" or something but it turns out turkeys don't exist in the Magic Universe. So it started to degenerate to food tribal which could still be a fun deck. I have ideas though so if anyone wants to finish what I start feel free. Maybe when I get bored of Book Tribal I'll move to Food Tribal.

It would probably be a Commander deck but could also just be a kitchen table deck.

If it's Commander start with this:

Karametra, God of Turkey and Mashed Potatos
If you're not building a Commander deck start with this card as well. God of Harvests is pretty Thanksgiving-y. Also fits the "food tribal" theme because people harvest food sometimes. As you can tell, when it comes to tribal I'm pretty loose with the rules. That comes from my parents being super loose with the rules when I was a kid. I was allowed to have dessert after I finished my vegetables and stay up until 10 PM. One time they even let me stay up until 11PM. It was a crazy childhood.

Me today
This definitely fits the theme of Thanksgiving because it's not really Thanksgiving until I'm just a giant blob of food. Even after I hit that point though I just keep going. No food is spared. I don't even really eat it, I just blend it all together and make a gravy-turkey shake. Devour is also a fitting mechanic for food tribal so this card and any other card that has devour and is on color can be a good fit here.

High School cafeteria lunch amirite?
This card has food in it. There you go. That's all there is to it really. Food in art means it fits. This card could also be good in combination with Karametra since when you play a creature you get a free land and draw a card. This is better food synergy than my turkey meat shake.

"Describe your relationship with a Magic card"
And finally the most important part of this deck. Hot Soup. Such a mediocre card with a lot of flavor. The soup I mean, because soup has a lot of flavor. The card has pretty good flavor too, though. Carrying hot soup makes you unblockable which makes sense because have you ever tried blocking soup? I did once when I worked at Denny's. I was trying to save a beautiful stack of pancakes from getting all soggy so I threw my body in front of it. I had burns all over but then they just covered me in cold pudding and I was all set to finish my shift. I'm just waiting for the "Cold Pudding" artifact equipment now.

Cold Pudding      1

Equipped creature does not untap during your untap step.
Equipped creature has menace.
Prevent all damage dealt to a creature equipped with Cold Pudding.
When Cold Pudding is unequipped from a creature destroy that creature.

Equip 3

This pretty much sums up how I felt. I was unstoppable and felt no pain with cold pudding but as soon as it was removed I wanted to die.

Alright deck builders, here is your holiday inspiration for a new deck so go out and build. Those of you who do build a food/Thanksgiving deck please share it with us. We at team Heavy Salami would love to see what food based decks can be made. Mostly because we love food. The Magic part is okay too though.

I know I said this last time but next week I will have a new Standard deck for everyone and I actually will this time too. Have a happy Thanksgiving and eat until you feel like a bad person!

Want to share your Thanksgiving meal with us? Want to share your food tribal list with us? Do you also feel like a gluttonous slime? Tell us in the comments or send us a sexy private message!

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